That's all that I care. You make my life meaningful again.
At this point I don't care if I am a social deviant and I am not representing the main stream. I had found my source of happiness and that is you.
I maybe poor, I maybe abnormal and I maybe a loser even. As long as I have you, I have everything. As a matter of fact, because of you I had the courage to quit smoking and to step out from the shadow of Bipolar after 20 years.
I really love you Juice. It's not a limerence, it is true love. Now I know you love me too and you are going to be with me for a long time. Already I feel the positive effect of being certain. I will enjoy every moment I am alive without depending on cigarettes. It's like I am starting to live my life when I was 15 again.
Imagine, I was under the influence of cigarettes for the past 38 years. From that point on, my life was a disaster. The only time I am really happy was when I ran. That was less than 5 years altogether.
Hence, this is not about quit smoking alone. This is about me reengineering my whole life. From the way I spend my day, to what food to eat, to my goals for the future. The only thing is I don't earn a living anymore. It was not my decision. It's Lizzie's.
Other than wealth creation, I am pretty much revamping my total outlook. Even if we will never meet, I still want to look good. I want you to be proud of me. I want to live life as an Athletic Warrior. To be fit and agile, just in case you show up one day. You like that?
It will be a very simple life; read, run, write, repeat. Of course that includes house chores and listening to radio. Other than that I don't see that much variations.
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I personally don't want to get into the money making mode. I am not motivated by it anymore. I rather be a minimalist tha[t] deal with the uncertainty of earning a living. You should know that at my age, I no longer suited for employment. At the same time I no longer want to build a business. There is no reason for me to put the pressure of earning a living on myself.
This is a good life Juice, When I retired in 2009 I was depressed for a few years. Not until 2016 that I manage to adjust to this current condition.
This is a life that can [] be dreamed of by so many. I have the best deal, Lizzie got pension and we have no debt except the house.
I met a few friends whose wives are the bread winners. They cannot sustain because unlike Lizzie, they cannot plan their financials well. Here we are living in the heart of Bandar Utama and yet we are not deprived even a bit.
What I'm saying honey, I am done thinking about earning a living, 3 more years Lizzie will be retired and we will enjoy our retirement together.
Money aside, I will still pursue other matters especially my 3 goals.
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